( I planned to post this on the 23rd of September, my birthday. But for reasons, I thought it might not be, you know, appropriate. But reading it again this afternoon, I have realized, this isn't really much of a self-pity post, it's my life now. so here you go...)
I planned this year to be awesome – apparently it’s not.
I planned this coming birthday of mine as a blast, something worth remembering, but I guess this ain’t gonna be. I’d rather have a small, but meaningful, birthday celebration here at home. Pansit and some chiffon cake would be enough. But of course, I’d love to hear them sing happy birthday to me. Nothing much to expect; nothing much to look forward to; but should I say this would be my saddest birthday, I’d say no. this would be one of my most meaningful. And yes, this would also be something that’s really enlightened.
My family, the very family I have been so proud of has got issues, has got many little secrets that now I know. My sibs have got their issues too; all of them have got a thing or two that they keep dear to themselves. Others, with others. My niece and nephews are all growing, well, older now. And all of them promise a great future ahead. These things make my family, well, normal. It makes it complete – so perfectly flawed that I love it! These are the things that make my days, lately, full of reflections – and yes, new dreams.
Life at 23 is something that others look forward to.
But do I have the courage now?
in the end...
(c) photo: http://instagram.com/pilyongbrenttzu