perspectives

There are things that are meant to scare us, some to scare us to death.

Well, I guess I have this scared-to-death tendency especially now that my medications are high.

Scared-to-death is one thing that’s common in my make-up, in my structure or whatever; I know you get the point. But there is also one great thing about being way too scared, you usually cling on to a thing or two for hope – or at least for your survival even for just a night.

The way we see things greatly affects the way the world sees us in return. Frankly, I haven’t been the best of a person, but the world has had rewarded me with good company. My deeds have been recognized and I have been, so to say, celebrated at my own right. I have been an Atenista, a true blue Atenista and I have performed well in the field I have chosen to belong. In a line, I have been living a life.

Until things changed; until my health took most of my dreams away and reminded me, in my weakest, that I am nothing – that I am no one.

Now I don’t even get to fix much of the way I look. I don’t even mind being unable to bathe. It is not because I have lost my sanity, it is because I have gained more wisdom, I would like to think. I would be turning 23 come the 23^rd of this year. And God knows how much I have wanted to ‘change’ my life. But life changed me instead. My entire life’s plan is gone and it’s replaced with something far greater than I to comprehend. Perspectives have changed and so did my life – for the better. Although I have to admit that my scared-to-death tendencies are still way too fresh, am also far more happy-to-death each time I turn a thing or two into a reality. Each time I am able to actually help one – without even intending to, or even noticing. It is fun to be a real person; a person who hurts and cries – but also learns how to laugh and laugh some more.

My sister said a line that took lots of my old self;

“Pwede ka naman talaga palang maging masaya, without pushing yourself to much”

D*mn right! And for that, I loved her even more! I understand how and why she behaved the past months – and partly, I also understood myself better. This line doesn’t make me perfect or my sister; but with so much hope, I really wish this opens us to changes, to greater positivity – and yes, even to a deeper and far more appreciative way of living.

I hope same for you! Thanks for reading! :)

I told him it’s better, better than before.

We plan our lives out.

In a world of measurable achievements; a well crafted plan plus a well executed step by step process is by far a thing that many aspire to do. I included. As planned, I should be holding a middle management position by now at Summit Media and doing some articles about lifestyle in between my Marketing stints. I should have been paying for a low priced condo unit with Avida and basically living the life.

But. There are BUTS in life that sometimes would break you – including all your life’s plans. These are the things that happen for the simplest reason that they should, or they would, or they simply could. Getting sick, losing a love one, learning that you’re down broke – anything that could reap away hope. It’s a sad thing. It is very sad and depressing. But, another BUT, it shall pass.

 

HOLDING on to your dreams could bring you so much hope.

 

I did it and am continuously holding into it.

(Photo: http://pinterest.com/brenttzu/brentography/)

I still can write, in spite of my visual limitations. I still can talk should come the time that I really have to bid good bye to my vision. Besides, I have a family that cares for me more than I think they do, should worse come to worse.

Frankly, when you face a life’s challenge as big as mine, the world actually becomes brighter. I don’t anymore consider this situation as a hindrance, but a vital part of my growth. My nephew, a few days ago asked me how my eyes feel and how they see things. I told him it’s better, better than before. Literally it is not, but the perspective changed. And so did I, I would like to think.

photo (c) : http://pinterest.com/brenttzu/brentography/

So cheer up. 

Nothing in this world is ought to bring us down - not even being unable to do all your planned out goals.

The spontaneous and the unplanned is far more fun! The measurable is for those who simply seek to finish, those who like to enjoy seek adventure – and life’s supposed to be that way.

***

Enjoy the coming long weekend guys!  

standing on unfamiliar ground

This was originally posted last year on my deleted wordpress blog, and for the sake of sharing,  i would like to share this post again. #INSPIRE  

On my way to the movies yesterday, I dropped by the grocery to get something for me and (name deleted) to munch on. It was not a typical day as there was a rather thicker crowd due to the long weekend. I grabbed some chips and two sodas; and headed towards the express counter. It was taking ages there, apparently, so I decided to look for another counter.

And found a line that I have never imagined I would be falling into – ever.

But since things have changed; I found my toes standing on an unfamiliar ground; one that I am slowly accepting.

Since I look extremely normal with my glasses on, the sales lady reminded that the line was supposed to be for senior citizens and disabled. I took a deep breath and tried to speak up. But I mumbled. Surprisingly, even my body seems to deny it still. But I guess, she then noticed, that I was allowed to make my payments there.

I am one eyed, technically (and legally) visually impaired. But since I have lived a really normal life before I completely lost my left eye’s vision, I find it hard to adapt to new things, to new pesky and perky things.

I would like to think though, that lining up in a senior citizen/disabled lane was a perky thing. Not to mention, a very bold move, a move of acceptance for me.

The night before, a friend was asking my thoughts on how to rid off insecurities, on how to fully accept the person that she is. In response, I texted her this…

Ask. Accept. It’s a two step process, two hard steps though.

I guess, I can say that I know how this process works now, I mean better now. It is not a limitation to have such of this condition. Together with the many others differently-able out there, I am proud to say that we are; I am different. It is not really a weakness to be different. And yes we might require special treatment on certain cases, but that never warrants us the limitation. It does not make us weaker. But rather it makes us stronger; to be able to live quite like other normal individuals, in spite of our difference.

Acceptance is something that we give ourselves. It is not something that others would give us, it comes from within. Love the person that you are and the world would love you back – no questions asked.